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(Satire?)

EXCLUSIVE TO PRIDE’S PURGE!

Our fearless reporter, Tom Pride, has managed to hack into Rupert Murdoch’s private cell phone and record this remarkable conversation between Nick Clegg and Rupert Murdoch.

Here’s the transcript of their conversation in full:

Clegg: Hi Rupert. It’s Nick.

Murdoch: Nick who?

Clegg: Nick Clegg.

Murdoch: Give me a clue.

Clegg: Deputy Prime Minister.

Murdoch: Which country?

Clegg: The UK.

Murdoch: Oh, right. What is it Nick? I’m busy.

Clegg: Just a quick one.

Murdoch: I’m Rupert, not Rebekah.

Clegg: Oh yes, very good, very droll. Just wanted to run something past you.

Murdoch: I’m waiting.

Clegg: OK. Well, you know you’ve been getting advice from former and present prime ministers on how to deal with the hacking scandal?

Murdoch: I’m still waiting.

Clegg:  I wondered if maybe you might like me to give you a bit of advice, you know, with me being Deputy Prime Minister and all, you know in exchange for a bit of positive coverage in your media outlets?

Murdoch: No. Can I go now?

Clegg: Yes yes, of course. But If you ever need any advice……

Murdoch: F*ck off Nick.

Clegg: OK, Rupert, will do, thank you for your time and I’d just like to ……

Click

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Related articles by Tom Pride:

Remember this? Murdoch hack drove Denholm Elliot’s daughter to suicide

Here’s a list of all the people Rupert Murdoch has blamed for NI’s problems. So far….…

The Sun sends page 3 girl and 4 cans of lager to help flooded Somerset village (not satire!)

MP Louise Mensch quits to spend more time with the Murdoch family

Diet High In Red Tops Increases Risk of Heart Attacks

Controversial urine extraction method given go-ahead by government

Met police loaned retired mounted officer to Rebekah Brooks

Murdoch Cuts Price of Sun on Sunday’s Bribes by Half

Murdoch’s Twitter Followers Complain About Lack Of Tits In His Tweets

Sun journalists complain investigative journalism will harm investigative journalism

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