Tags
(satire?)
Scientists and ornithology experts are saying they are baffled as to how a pair of great tits – known by their Latin name Parus Major – have managed to take up residence in a residential street in central Westminster.
Blue tits – whose usual habitat is in the shire regions of south-east England such as Oxfordshire and Buckinghamshire – are not normally found in inner city and urban areas and are increasingly rare in northern parts of the UK, having become completely extinct in Scotland.
However, scientists say they have discovered a pair of tits residing in two adjoining houses in Downing Street since early to mid 2010 and experts think they have only been able to survive by living on a diet of guile, duplicity and French champagne – all of which can be found in great abundance in that part of Westminster.
Ornithologists say over the last three years they have increasingly discovered more and more tits residing in parts of Westminster – particularly around the Downing St area – although according to experts it is thought they are unlikely to breed as too many of them are cocks.
Iain Duncan Smith. A great tit. And a cock.
.
Related articles by Tom Pride:
Theresa May Announces Critical Thinking To Become Class C Drug
Parliament backs plans to cull paupers
Scientific study reveals up to 95% of Tory DNA is Neanderthal
Severe conditions alert for UK as deep drifts of ministerial incompetence paralyse the country
Scientists Succeed in Growing Balls on Liberal Democrats in Laboratory
.
Please feel free to comment – you don’t need to register and I’m extremely minimal with the moderating – so please go ahead.
.
If you click on any of these buttons below, you’ll be doing me a favour by sharing this article with other people. Thanks:
Rev. Green said:
Love it, thanks for the chuckle!
LikeLike
Pingback: Alternative News Network – Ornithologists baffled by pair of Great Tits taking up residence in Downing St
jaynel62 said:
Not finding much to smile at lately so a huge Thanks from me Tom xx
LikeLike
Guy Ropes said:
Too much to expect a cull of these annoying creatures I suppose – or does that come in 2015? By that time of course they will have transmogrified into Big Tits and may have become more difficult to get rid of. Can’t we form a group to help them on their way? I propose a “Tits Out” (not necessarily just for t’lads) movement of which I will volunteer to be membership secretary………….. but I already foresee problems with the suggestion even as I type it.
LikeLike
guy fawkes said:
These nitwits deserve the lol comments from the titwits.
LikeLike
guy fawkes said:
Security July/August 2010
The Case for Calling Them Nitwits
They blow each other up by mistake. They bungle even simple schemes. They get intimate with cows and donkeys.
the above encapsulates most of your posts about government.
LikeLike
guy fawkes said:
http://www.theatlantic.com/magazine/archive/2010/07/the-case-for-calling-them-nitwits/308130/ Sorry this is the link for the above
LikeLike
bobchewie said:
big tits appear in copies of the SUN …which explains all those nice expensive lunches by the murdochian press…
LikeLike
Pingback: Blue tit at feeder | Dear Kitty. Some blog
Pingback: Russia Warns It Will Arrest Openly Tory Athletes at Winter Olympics | Pride's Purge
Pingback: ‘Mini-brains’ grown by scientists in lab give valuable insight into BNP voters | Pride's Purge
Pingback: How Tory are you? Take the Tory-o-Meter test and find out! | Pride's Purge
Pingback: Tory MP attacks George Osborne as ‘corporatist’ | Pride's Purge