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(satire)

Cambridgeshire police are investigating comments made on Twitter by BNP leader Nick Griffin about a gay builder called Bob who likes to wear checked shirts and has a cat he calls ‘Pilchard’.

The MEP published the address of Bob and Pilchard on the social networking site and called for a demonstration to be held outside Bob’s home where he keeps all his heavy plant machinery, every single one of which he has given a name to.

The tweets, under the username @nickgriffinmep, attacked Mr Bob, 34, and his 26-year-old purely platonic business partner Wendy after it was revealed Bob has named his bright yellow cement mixer ‘Dizzy’ and calls his bright purple forklift truck ”Trix’.

The controversy comes hot on the heels of an unconnected incident in which police were called to investigate complaints that a neighbour of the couple, Farmer Pickles, was growing cannabis after it was revealed he was spending an inordinate amount of time and money fixing a fence around a field containing just 5 carrots.

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Related articles by Tom Pride:

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A world full of war, hunger & man’s inhumanity to man and who does God punish? Tesco!

Scottish Conservatives Show Support For Oppressed Minorities By Electing Openly Tory Leader

Not Tory! Post-Tory, ex-Tory and proud. Get over it!

Liam Fox is not gay

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