(satire?)

Pope Francis has said it is OK for voters to smack Nick Clegg – as long as his dignity is maintained.

The Pope made the remarks during his weekly general audience which was devoted to the role of maintaining discipline with wayward or misbehaving Liberal Democrat leaders.

Outlining the traits of a good voter, Pope Francis said it is one who is able to forgive Mr Clegg – despite his extremely naughty behaviour such as lying and cheating – but is also able to “correct the Deputy Prime Minister with firmness” while not discouraging or humiliating him.

Francis said: “One time, I heard a former Lib Dem voter say “I sometimes feel the need to smack Nick Clegg a bit, but never in the face so as to not humiliate him“. And we all understand that. Because we are obviously not speaking about committing violence or cruelty against Mr Clegg, but rather about helping him to grow and mature.”

The Pope’s controversial comments come just weeks after Nick Clegg shockingly accused leading members of the Conservative Party of systematically abusing and using him in what he called a “humiliating 5-year long orgy of perversion, deviation and debauchery” as Deputy Prime Minister in the coalition government.

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