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(satire?)
The prime minister David Cameron has pledged UK troops could be sent to defend strategic oil fields and supply lines if they continue to be threatened by SNP militants in the north of the country.
The heightening of tensions in the oil-rich region comes after overnight clashes between the leader of the breakaway militant group – a shadowy figure who goes by the nom-de-guerre of Al Ek – and a representative of the ruling clan Al Is Tairdar Ling in which substantial gains were made by the hardline militants.
Militant forces have moved closer in recent weeks to gaining complete control of essential oil and gas fields in the nominally independent northern provinces and are threatening to completely cut off all oil and gas supplies to the rest of the country.
Fighting is raging around the Kelvingrove Museum and Art Gallery, and reports from the frontline indicate the militants have bolstered their forces in and around their strongholds in the remote and inhospitable areas of the regional capital Glasgow.
Military experts think the militants might also be preparing a counter-offensive to retake the strategically important highland areas as well as approaches to the M8 motorway guarding the capital and other economically important nearby towns.
A government spokesperson dismissed claims that threats of a ground war including UK troops being deployed on the front line to defend oil fields were being exaggerated:
“If you think the UK government would not be prepared to go to war over oil, you should think again,” he said.
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Please feel free to comment.
peter said:
Well, we’ve lost control of the Middle East, Russia is annexing the Ukraine, the last thing wee need at this time is to lose control of the Scottish oil & gas fields…..
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penniewoodfall said:
Hey Tom,if I sign up for the counter offensive,me being militant like,do I get to wear all those trendy outfits…you know the ones 🙂
I could eva so ache to be seen in Haute Couture!
If so…..then I’m signing up!
However….no need to worry about the ‘keffiyeh’ coz I’ve got one! 🙂
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penniewoodfall said:
Peter…I do not agree with you over Russia!
Dam!
And it’s too late to undo the ‘like’ bit!
Go home! 🙂
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overburdenddonkey said:
we now have countermeasures in place, that can be downloaded @ the speed of light (well oil be workin’ on that over the next few days) onto various platforms and other recipients…which includes playing the “indian love call” @ very high volumes from secret locations along and near hadrians wall, if we can the satnavs working, and find it that is..
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overburdenddonkey said:
also uncovered is this vid tape, of al-al and al-ek speaking in an incomprehensible language, too rapturous applause… http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kgNgcBW1CPE
i’m reliable informed that al-al exclaimed; “of course you can use the “pound” after you leave, it will be worthless in anyway, so there!”…after extensive research we have discovered that the “pound” is a currency, al-al et-al have been ranting on about it for some considerable time and about a plan B..although what buses have to do with it we cannot as yet comprehend! charles rennie mackintosh is unavailable for comment..
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barbara1926 said:
And coming up on ITV it’s Jeff Pope’s mini-series ‘Lulu’, in which Maggie Gyllenhall portrays the singer. She’s so bloody British dahlings!
Love, Barbara
Date: Tue, 26 Aug 2014 14:44:08 +0000 To: barbara1926@live.co.uk
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John Ward said:
I sense the activity of obfuscating agents in the pay of McI5 in all this. Truth is nearly always stranger than fiction:
http://hat4uk.wordpress.com/2014/08/25/new-scottish-vote-shocker-rail-network-sides-with-sassenachs/
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overburdenddonkey said:
john
help is @ hand… #patronisingbtlady http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OLAewTVmkAU
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guy fawkes said:
John
I laughed my socks off, but if I lived in Scotland I would vote yes.
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FinkFurst said:
It is funny, but it’s Photoshopped. There’s another version of the same photo but with Alistair Darling. In fact the new Flying Scotsman doesn’t have a photo of anybody on it.
So John – Is fiction stranger than fiction?
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overburdenddonkey said:
more news from the front line emerges..www.youtube.com/watch?v=TWzfDfYCSCY
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overburdenddonkey said:
ps whoops… http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TWzfDfYCSCY
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overburdenddonkey said:
by contrast yes means… http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bbWnBX6BY5A
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overburdenddonkey said:
more breaking news, there is a regiment of welsh bards and lovebombers on their way to glasgow right now, go cymru!…. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UsiVjvN5I74
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guy fawkes said:
For you in some instances it replaces fact! That was to Fink for his bending of the truth towards me in the past.
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