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(satire?)

In a surprise move, ATOS have declared themselves unfit to declare whether people declared unfit for work are fit for work after the French firm declared themselves fit to declare themselves unfit for work.

In a short statement, ATOS said that although they had previously declared themselves unfit to decide the fitness for work of people who – like themselves – had also been declared unfit for work they still regarded themselves fit to decide their own fitness for work:

“Obviously, we are fit to decide that we are not fit to decide our own fitness for work,” a spokesperson for the French firm said. “That’s obvious,” she added.

However, critics claim the fitness for work tests administered by ATOS on behalf of the Department for Work and Pensions are unreliable after it was revealed many of the medical staff employed by ATOS to conduct the assessments were unable to distinguish between parts of the body used by claimants to sit on and their elbows.

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Related articles by Tom Pride:

ATOS declare Richard III fit for work

ATOS to reduce ‘fit for work’ test to one question: “Are you alive?”

The single killer question from ATOS that drove a woman to suicide

UK pulls out of 2016 Paralympics after ATOS declares no disabled in UK

DWP blames cancer patient for her illness

Proof that ATOS expect people with incurable conditions like cerebral palsy to “get better”

ATOS assessor found blind woman fit for work after “wiggling his fingers” in front of her eyes

Toby Young – disabled children should be excluded from schools

ATOS declare George Osborne unfit for work as Chancellor

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