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(not satire – it’s the Tories!)

Tory MP for Croydon South Richard Ottaway called the police when a group of 11 pensioners turned up at his surgery to deliver a petition.

He claimed he was worried about being “murdered” by his constituents.

No, I promise you this is not satire. Here’s the full story:

Croydon South MP Sir Richard Ottaway calls police over constituents delivering petition

Interestingly, Ottaway was knighted in the New Year’s Honours list for ‘services to politics’ – which even the the Daily Mail described as an example of “Cronyism and low-level corruption”.

Even more bizarrely, Ottaway has now threatened to call the police again if more than 10 of his constituents turn up at one of his surgeries:

If I discover more than 10 unknown people are to descend on my surgery, I will be notifying the police in the future.”

Why on earth aren’t the police warning him about wasting police time? Are they running scared perhaps because ‘Sir’ Ottaway is a good friend of Andrew ‘Plebgate’ Mitchell?

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