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The Met Office has issued an urgent warning of thick fog and mist covering most of Vince Cable’s mind after he claimed in an interview yesterday to be both against government policies while at the same time voting consistently in support of them.

Members of the public are urged to take extra care when voting as the Business Secretary’s visibility was reduced to zero in many areas and major disruption reported in his ability to tell the difference between being in government and in opposition.

However, the Met said the worst of the fog should start to clear by about May 2015, when most of the Liberal Democrats should be cleared out of parliament.

The chaos and disruption also affected parts of the Guardian newspaper when thick fog caused its political editor to report that Lib Dem MPs had voted against the Bedroom Tax when in fact the vast majority of them had voted to support it.


Related articles by Tom Pride:

Met Office warns record-breaking hot air from Lib Dems to continue

Vince Cable’s opinion on loss of triple-A credit rating ‘largely symbolic’, says Vince Cable

Zoologists – Vince Cable and Ed Balls ready to mate soon

How much did cuddly Vince Cable know about the hanging of innocent Nigerian playwright Ken Saro-Wiwa?

Lib Dems poll fewer votes than the Pirate Party in by-election (not satire!)

Authorities return Nick Clegg to natural family after DNA tests reveal he’s a Tory

Come on Nick Clegg admit it – the Lib Dems f*cked up by voting for Gove’s education reforms

Nick Clegg Sells Principles To Debenhams

Nick Clegg to Lib Dems – “Prepare for Oppositionment!”

Sheffield man left with nothing after falling victim to Westminster conmen

Coalition split after Tory minister says UK ‘peppered’ with too many wind-powered Lib Dem MPs



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