Tags

, , ,

(satire?)

The Chancellor of the Exchequer George Osborne this week set out an increased range of financial support and help from the Government to help Tory MPs keep their horses warm, healthy and safe throughout the winter.

It is estimated that there are about twelve stables belonging to Conservative Members of Parliament without proper insulation and as many as 20 horses belonging to Tory MPs that are having to live without any form of central heating during the winter.

Meeting with backbench and other Conservative MPs in Westminster today, Mr Osborne described the situation of Tory MPs’ horses at risk of going cold as ‘scandalous’:

It is scandalous that in a modern, wealthy country like the UK, so many of my colleagues’ horses are at risk of getting cold this winter. That is why we will now be doing more than ever before to help ourselves to huge amounts of taxpayers’ money to make sure our horses survive the winter months in comfort and warmth.

.

In response to the equine energy poverty crisis, the Chancellor has announced the Warm Equine Front programme, which will offer millionaire Tory MPs credit free installation of central heating in their barns and stables. Under the scheme, Conservative members of parliament will also be able to claim £12,000 towards the costs of installing it in other outhouses on their country estates that are at present without central heating.

The new programme not only ensures that Tory MPs’ horses can keep warm and healthy during the winter, it also has the added advantage of keeping MPs’ stable fuel bills down – by around £3,000 a year.

The energy companies have announced they will match this programme by extending free insulation to all Conservative MPs’ stables, and offering between £20,125 and £22,175 towards the costs of insulation for all other of their outhouses if they agree to vote against Labour leader Ed Miliband’s idea to freeze consumer energy bills for two years.

.

Related articles by Tom Pride:

Here’s the real reason the CEO of Energy UK can lie so easily about price rises:

This graph shows wholesale energy costs are not the reason our bills have been going up

Oh dear – look what Ed Davey was saying about nuclear power before he became a minister

Lib Dems and Tories have just agreed higher UK electricity bills for the next 35 years

Let’s get this straight. Foreign energy firms are threatening to cut us off if we don’t pay up.

Mandelson adviser’s close links to energy firms revealed

Frozen pensioners contain higher levels of vitamins and antioxidants say scientists

EXCLUSIVE – see these new tariffs from British Gas for hard-up customers

David Cameron stands by plan to reduce energy bills with more hot air

Coalition split after Tory minister says UK ‘peppered’ with too many wind-powered Lib Dem MPs

Controversial urine extraction method given go-ahead by government 

.

Please feel free to comment – you don’t need to register and I’m extremely minimal with the moderating.

.