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(satire?)

Ed Miliband must “bring back the heavy hitters” like John Prescott to strengthen his team and beat the shit out of anyone throwing eggs or thinking they can have a go, an influential former MP said on Tuesday.

Chris Mullin, a former Foreign Office minister under Tony Blair, suggested a return for former Deputy Prime Minister John Prescott, who he said was someone with a “very credible left hook” who the public trusted would be able to “punch the lights out of any joker trying it on”.

Senior Labour figures have voiced concern over the apparent summer silence from so-called party heavyweights over the egging Ed Miliband got, none of whom were prepared to go outside and knuckle up with the guy responsible – some even suggesting a shadow front bench reshuffle could be imminent to get rid of the lightweight yellow-bellied wusses.

Mr Mullin said:

I think Ed Miliband could get enough support if he had nutted the guy who egged him,” he told the BBC’s World At One.

Personally I’d have kneed him in the knackers. And someone like John Prescott is an immensely credible figure when it comes to dealing with anyone daft enough to try starting something and perhaps Labour could make more use of his very effective method for flooring opponents. Like punching them in the face.

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