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(satire?)

Senior Conservative and Liberal Democrat leaders have pocketed a £520,000 bequest to the ‘sick and the weak’ left in an elderly spinster’s will saying it was meant for them.

When she died aged 90, former nurse Jenny Norton left a fortune which the Coalition parties shared between them claiming that when Mrs Norton said the money should be used to “help the sick and the weak” she was referring to the Conservatives and Liberal Democrats respectively.

A coalition spokesperson explained why the two parties decided to take the money:

Very few people would argue that the Liberal Democrats are weaker than a week-old baby and clearly it would be hard to find anyone in the country sicker than the present leadership of the Conservatives. So obviously the money was meant for us.

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