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(satire – I think)

Speaking in House of Lords debate on happy marriage, Justin Welby says cheerful people who never bicker about anything will undermine miserable marriage as basis for rearing children.

The Archbishop of Canterbury, Justin Welby, has accused the government of attacking the institution of miserable heterosexual marriage in order to promote the rights of people with a happy disposition to get married.

As peers embarked on a two-day debate in the House of Lords, Welby said:

Allowing marriages to be gay, happy and jolly would cause deep divisions in society and goes against our Christian inheritance of having miserable marriages where we constantly fall out with each other over the slightest things.

Welby joined several other peers who criticised the government’s plans to allow happy marriages and protested that neither the Lib Dem nor Tory 2010 manifesto included a pledge to allow cheerful weddings in their manifestos.

In his speech, Welby said:

The ancient and traditional concept of marriage as a normative place for falling out with each other over who has control of the TV remote is lost. The idea of marriage as a a unique lifelong union, where two people can constantly whinge about each other for the rest of their lives is diminished.

The family in its normal sense of a base community of society where people get irritated with each other over stupid things like who ate the last chocolate digestive is weakened.

For these and many other reasons those of us in the churches and faith groups, who are extremely hesitant about allowing marriages to be happy, hold that view because we think that traditional miserable marriage is a cornerstone of society.

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Did you know the name Gideon is Hebrew for ‘Destroyer’. Really.

David Cameron is Jesus. Probably.

A world full of war, hunger & man’s inhumanity to man and who does God punish? Tesco!

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