Tags
Cameron, elections, EU, human rights, immigration, international, UKIP
(satire – barely)
In a fresh attempt to curb expected mass immigration into the United Kingdom Independence Party, the government has announced a crackdown on short-term migrants from the Tory Party.
The new ‘UKIP Immigration Bill‘ is the centre piece of the government’s planned new laws to prevent an expected mass migration of right-wing voters into the UKIP this summer, set out by the Queen at the State Opening of Parliament.
Announcing the crackdown as part of the Queen’s Speech, the government said that new arrivals into UKIP will have to pay more for NHS care, landlords will be forced to check their tenants voting status to ensure they were not fruitcakes and UKIP supporters will not get driving licences.
David Cameron said the package would boost recovery, particularly of his personal poll ratings – and that the new UKIP Immigration Bill will make it easier to discourage the huge number of Tory MPs who may be planning on entering the UKIP in the near future.
.
Related articles by Tom Pride:
Bananas, nuts and fruitcakes express outrage at being compared to UKIP members
UKIP candidate – physical exercise prevents homosexuality (no – not satire)
Nigel Farage, the Tea Party Godfather and the man who tried to trash the pound. Twice.
UKIP chairman – every UK city should have 1 or 2 ‘holding’ camps for immigrants
Cameron must be balder to counter UKIP threat say senior Tory slapheads
Shock as fringe, right-wing “Tory” party comes 3rd in Eastleigh by-election
UKIP candidate – UK dinners flooded by criminal gangs of eastern European horses
If UKIP is so bloody libertarian – why has it said nothing against secret courts?
Government ministers announce plan to deter immigrants to UK by making it shit
See sample of new negative ads about UK for Romania and Bulgaria
Oops! Daily Mail gets British immigration test wrong
Daily Mail – Outrage As Number Of UK Immigrants On Podiums Hits Record Levels!
UKIP and a little matter of bestiality and necrophilia …..
.
Please feel free to comment – you don’t need to register and I’m extremely minimal with the moderating – so please go ahead.
.
By the way, if you click on any of these buttons below, you’ll be doing me a favour by sharing this article with other people. Thanks:
Pride's Purge 
Reblogged this on Gogwit's Blog and commented:
Satire? The Queen’s Speech, shurely?
LikeLike
I think this queen’s speech has, more than any other, reached the pinnacle of coalition intelligence and political verve. It has reminded us all of just how adept the coalition is at nurturing this country in times of hardship, of how it is offering the population a clear vision of our future wellbeing and of determining who will be the new manager of manchester united.
LikeLike
In times of political anarchy, get the royal family to produce more offspring, find a scapegoat for what is going wrong i.e. the sick and unemployed or start a war!
That should cause enough distraction from the thieving, lying, manipulating establishment.
LikeLike
Her Majesty’s response to your comment (according to a Buckingham Palace spokesman) was: “Please… one will not address me as Shirley!!” [with acknowledgement to AIRPLANE, the movie]
LikeLike
Any disreputable Tory MP who is thinking of jumping ship should be sent straightway to Conservative Central Office….. for mind-retraining :)-
LikeLike
tunefultony
They should be paid wp rates for retraining = zilch.
LikeLike
Thanks for the head’s up.
“Gogwit’s Blog, By Appointment…” has a nice ring to it.
(Shirley not! – Don’t etc.)
Actually it was the Bill Deedes style editor beloved of the satirical ‘Private Eye’ magazine I had in mind.
Leslie Nielsen does it for me, too, though!
LikeLike
Pingback: Cameron announces plans to grow moustache as ex-BBC sports presenters desert Tories in droves | Pride's Purge
Pingback: PM denies confusion after announcing support for vote supporting supporters of vote on EU vote | Pride's Purge
Pingback: Toffs more likely to cheat, defect and be traitors (so Cameron’s in trouble) | Pride's Purge
Pingback: Nadine Dorries suggests standing as joint Tory – Monster Raving Loony Party candidate | Pride's Purge
Pingback: Anti-English nationalist anger at anti-immigrant English nationalist immigrant Farage | Pride's Purge
Pingback: Class warfare comes to the Tory Party | Pride's Purge
Pingback: Some interesting facts about the creature known as the Common Loon (all true) | Pride's Purge
Pingback: Lord Tebbit – gay marriage threat to bees as queens more likely to become lesbians | Pride's Purge