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(satire – barely)

In a fresh attempt to curb expected mass immigration into the United Kingdom Independence Party, the government has announced a crackdown on short-term migrants from the Tory Party.

The new ‘UKIP Immigration Bill‘ is the centre piece of the government’s planned new laws to prevent an expected mass migration of right-wing voters into the UKIP this summer, set out by the Queen at the State Opening of Parliament.

Announcing the crackdown as part of the Queen’s Speech, the government said that new arrivals into UKIP will have to pay more for NHS care, landlords will be forced to check their tenants voting status to ensure they were not fruitcakes and UKIP supporters will not get driving licences.

David Cameron said the package would boost recovery, particularly of his personal poll ratings – and that the new UKIP Immigration Bill will make it easier to discourage the huge number of Tory MPs who may be planning on entering the UKIP in the near future.


Related articles by Tom Pride:

Bananas, nuts and fruitcakes express outrage at being compared to UKIP members

UKIP candidate – physical exercise prevents homosexuality (no – not satire)

Nigel Farage, the Tea Party Godfather and the man who tried to trash the pound. Twice.

UKIP chairman – every UK city should have 1 or 2 ‘holding’ camps for immigrants

Cameron must be balder to counter UKIP threat say senior Tory slapheads

Shock as fringe, right-wing “Tory” party comes 3rd in Eastleigh by-election

UKIP candidate – UK dinners flooded by criminal gangs of eastern European horses

If UKIP is so bloody libertarian – why has it said nothing against secret courts?

Government ministers announce plan to deter immigrants to UK by making it shit

See sample of new negative ads about UK for Romania and Bulgaria

Oops! Daily Mail gets British immigration test wrong

Daily Mail – Outrage As Number Of UK Immigrants On Podiums Hits Record Levels!

UKIP and a little matter of bestiality and necrophilia …..


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