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(satire – I think)

Flying in the face of expert opinion that former prime minister Margaret Thatcher was showing absolutely no signs of life, the Chancellor George Osborne has insisted the 87 year-old baroness is over the worst and is well on the way to making a full recovery.

Mr Osborne’s optimistic assessment of the health of Baroness Thatcher comes despite all indications yesterday that the longest-serving prime minister in the 20th century is in fact unlikely to ever recover from being dead.

However, despite the pessimism from people who actually know better, Mr Osborne said he was confident his recent budget was just as likely to resuscitate Lady Thatcher’s flatlining heartbeat as it was to bring about a recovery of Britain’s equally lifeless economy.


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Government scraps plans for society to pay for Thatcher funeral after realising it doesn’t exist

ATOS declare George Osborne unfit for work as Chancellor

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More People Believe In The Loch Ness Monster Than In Osborne’s Ability To Run Economy

UK suffers worst double-dipstick chancellor in 50 years

Did you know the name Gideon is Hebrew for ‘Destroyer’. Really.

George Osborne Is Not A Wanker – He’s A Genius!

Countdown – red faces as contestant spells out naughty word from OBSOREN

ONS Figures – Osborne’s inflated claims reach new 3 year high

Loss-Making Osborne To Be Sold Off to US Conglomerate


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