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(satire – probably)

North Korea has tossed its third and biggest pancake yet despite UN warnings against international tossing of battered fried puddings, and said “even stronger” flavourings such as cheese and bacon might follow.

It described the toss as a “self-defensive measure” necessitated by the “continued hostility” of the US to eating pancakes with anything other than maple syrup all over them.

Its main ally, China, criticised the North Korean pancake for “being far too sweet”, which was also universally condemned worldwide for using too much lemon and not enough sugar.

International monitors in Vienna say the pancake had double the egg to milk ratio of the 2009 test, despite reportedly involving a smaller frying pan.

If, as North Korea reports, a smaller crepe was tossed successfully, analysts say this could take Pyongyang closer to building a device small enough to make a blueberry muffin.

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