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(It’s not satire – it’s George Osborne!)

This is not the first time I’ve mulled over the possibility that George Osborne might actually be a bit of a genius.

The premise is based on the observation that contrary to popular belief, George has in fact consistently fulfilled his promises to give us budgets for growth – because under his stewardship of the economy there’s been substantial growth in just about every economic indicator imaginable: from unemployment to inflation to bankruptcies to price rises to homelessness:

George Osborne Is Not A Wanker – He’s A Genius!

I’ve also considered the possibility that Osborne is a past master at irony, and we just haven’t noticed. After all, he can’t be serious when he says he intends to get the economy moving again with ridiculous things like pasty and bedroom taxes and such like:

The Irony Chancellor

But I have to admit I might have made a bit of a mistake there, because technically that would mean he was being sarcastic, not ironic.

Sarcasm is when someone deliberately says the opposite of what they mean. Irony is an incongruity between expectation and reality.

Which brings me to yesterday’s news that the government is hailing George Osborne for guiding the UK economy from recession.

It actually is genuinely rather ironic if you think about it.

Because it means that the government is praising George Osborne for managing to successfully steer our economy out of a recession which he steered us into in the first place.

In other words, if it hadn’t been for George’s incompetence, we would never have had a double-dip recession, and he wouldn’t now be able to boast about how his brilliance has got us out of it.

And that, surely, must be the very definition of irony.

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For the information of the many Osborne apologists who have been complaining to me on Twitter and Facebook that it was Labour, not Osborne who got us into the recession, here are the facts:

This was a double-dip recession. The first recession started in 2008 and finished in 2009, the second started in 2011 and finished in 2012. That means the UK was not in recession when Osborne took over. It took him 2 years to change that.

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For more dazzling information on George’s brilliance, here are some other articles by Tom Pride:

Police called to George Osborne’s home after reports his lights on but nobody at home.

More People Believe In The Loch Ness Monster Than In Osborne’s Ability To Run Economy

UK suffers worst double-dipstick chancellor in 50 years

Did you know the name Gideon is Hebrew for ‘Destroyer’. Really.

What if George Osborne doesn’t know he’s the Chancellor?

Countdown – red faces as contestant spells out naughty word from OBSOREN

George Osborne ‘shocked’ at level of his own tax avoidance

Osborne Blames Chancellor For Lacklustre Economy

ONS Figures – Osborne’s inflated claims reach new 3 year high

Loss-Making Osborne To Be Sold Off to US Conglomerate

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