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(Not satire – it’s the UK today!)

The most amazing thing about London’s fire engines being sold off for £2 to a firm run by just one man* – a fellow old Etonian of David Cameron and Boris Johnson – is how nobody seems all that bothered by it.

Maybe most people haven’t heard about it.

Maybe people have got so used to our country being turned into some kind of banana republic, where everything’s owned by the leader’s circle of friends, that they don’t think it’s news worthy any more.

Or maybe people just don’t care about what happens to our essential services like fire, police, health?

I don’t know. But, maybe it should be repeated just one more time, just in case it’s the first reason.

London’s fleet of fire engines have been sold off to a private company for just £2. The company was only created one month ago, and has one sole director, Sir Aubrey Thomas Brocklebank (I assure you I’m not making this up – that’s his real name).

Nobody knows what Sir Aubrey is planning to do with his fire engines. His previous business experience consisted mainly of being chairman of a company which owns and runs bingo halls so maybe he’s going to put them to good use as mobile bingo calling centres, to replace the mobile libraries we used to have.

Or maybe he’s going to use them as ornamental fountains on his vast estate?

The weird thing is that no-one seems to know.

Does anyone even care any more?

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*Some people have pointed out the contract is for maintenance of the fire engines. However, the maintenance contract includes ownership of the fire engines themselves.

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Other articles by Tom Pride:

Tory Modernisers Vow To Drag Party Into 19th Century

Controversial urine extraction method given go-ahead by government

Prince Harry Heralds New Era Of Royal Openness By Getting His Tackle Out At A Party

Boris Johnson – 2 hours of port a day “made me who I am”

Genealogists Confirm David Cameron Is A Bastard

Peasants free to breed in peace as minister drops plans to shoot them

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