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The Prime Minister David Cameron has denied accusations his party are getting desperate to win back voter support after he guaranteed to personally sort through everyone’s emails, delete their spam for them and befriend everyone on Twitter and Facebook.

Announcing legislation which would mean he would be able to read the entire nation’s emails and social media updates, Mr Cameron said he was really interested in what everyone was eating for breakfast and seeing photographs of their pets:

It’s absolutely necessary that I’m able to keep regular updates on what everyone’s doing on Facebook and Twitter and able to read all your emails because then I’ll be able to personally monitor what you’re all saying about me.

A spokesperson for the opposition Labour party said it was unrealistic of the government to expect the Prime Minister to monitor everything which was being said about him:

At the moment especially, it would be an enormous task for the Prime Minister to keep abreast of all the things which are being said about him. The government should stop wasting tax payers money on this unnecessary project and get one of Mr Cameron’s aides to regularly tell him throughout the day what a toffee-nosed incompetent knob he is. That’s more or less what everyone’s saying anyway.


Allowing the Tories to claim they are the party of civil liberties, as they claimed before the last election, is like putting foxes in charge of the chicken coop.

Here’s a good article on why the left should be the guardians of civil liberties (note the word ‘should’):

Labour Should Be The Party of Civil Liberties

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