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Never mind former energy minister, Liberal Democrat MP Chris Huhne resigning because he’s facing charges of Perverting the Course of Justice. How about all the other Liberal Democrat MPs in the coalition resigning because of their ridiculous but tireless attempts to Justify the Course of Perversion?

Here are some of the more perverse policies coursing their way through parliament that the Liberal Democrats have been trying to justify, even though none of these were in their election manifesto:

Tripling Tuition Fees

Privatisation of the NHS

Biggest Cuts in State Education Since the 1950s

Cuts in Benefits to Sick & Disabled

UK Youth Forced To Work as Unpaid Slaves For Private Companies

Dismantling of the Welfare State

Failing to Protect the Environment

Failing to Protect Civil Liberties

etc etc etc

OK. So they all lied. And betrayed their supporters. And cheated the country. My question is, by betraying, cheating and lying to his most loyal supporter (his wife of 27 years) was Mr Huhne simply displaying normal Liberal Democrat values, or is it just the party leadership who think it’s OK to betray, cheat and lie to their most loyal supporters (the people who voted for them)?

In fact, now I think of it, if I was the prosecution during Mr Huhne’s forthcoming trial, I would seriously question his promise to “tell the truth the whole truth and nothing but the truth” in court.

After all, like all Liberal Democrat MPs, everyone knows their ‘pledges’ are worth less than the sheet of paper they’re written on.

So I therefore propose that the courts should supply Liberal Democrat MPs with their very own oath to swear in court. How about this:

I don’t pledge to tell the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth because as a Liberal Democrat MP everyone knows I’ll just go ahead and break my promise anyway, therefore I accept that if I don’t tell the truth this time, I will allow you to pull my bollocks off with a pair of pliers and feed them to the ducks. OK?

Would that keep them to their word do you think?


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