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A cull of codgers will go ahead in two areas of the country as part of the government’s efforts to tackle rising costs of pensions.
Environment Secretary Caroline Spelman told the Commons this week that the two, six-week trials this year will then be evaluated before a panel of experts decides whether the slaughter of old people is rolled out more widely across England, with up to 10 licences to cull the elderly being granted to farmers and landowners each year.
She wished there was an alternative but a vaccine against old age would take too long to develop and was difficult to administer to old codgers who needed to be caught or trapped first.
The two areas have yet to be selected but it is expected that the culling will lead to a reduction in government spending on pensions of 16 per cent.
Mrs Spelman said:
I know there is great strength of feeling on this issue but we can’t escape the fact that the evidence supports the case for the controlled reduction of the OAP population in order to minimise the financial burden old people place on society.
Mrs Spelman said the pilot scheme would look to confirm the Government’s assumptions about the “effectiveness, humanness and safety of the controlled shooting” of pensioners.
Farmers and landowers will carry out culling at their own expense having obtained a pensioner control licence from Natural England under the Protection of Codgers Act 1992.
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They should pay attention to the scientific evidence. It is confirmed that removal of the indigenous old codger population result in new individuals moving into the area, many of whom may be old codgers, and a majority of the remainder who will become old codgers. Culling will not reduce the population. I wonder if government should consider mass extermination… that would really make an impact on the pension’s bill.
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Please, don’t badger me about that. (Yes, I could tell right away this was a parody of the linked story even before clicking on the link–doing so only confirmed this.)
Baldrick must have been a Tory. They both have boasted of ‘cunning plans’, so there’s that.
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get rid of young Pakis and Blacks instead. They cost much more to keep
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