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Downing Street has rebuffed calls for No 10’s cat to be sacked after reports mice were allowed to enter and live there unchecked.

The cat, called Theresa, faces questions of incompetence as controversy grows over her part in a decision to relax controls which may have led to a dramatic increase in the numbers of unwanted newcomers.

The controversy has increased pressure at Number 10 over the Prime Minister’s poor choice of staff.

Asked whether Theresa should resign, the PM’s spokesman said:

Theresa is a good mouser and has a very strong predatory drive, although she can be quite wild and unruly sometimes and may have become lazy. But if the Prime Minister were to make his government appointments solely on the basis of on-the-job competence, he’d have a problem filling positions from his own party.

An opposition spokesperson said:

This is another of example of the government kowtowing to lazy fat cats who are living a life of luxury under the personal protection of the Prime Minister. Under a Labour administration, we would make certain there was enough in the kitty to ensure we were not being overrun by unwanted incomers.


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