The Liberal Democrats have proposed a radical new approach to solve the problem of pensioners fuel poverty, in which it is estimated as many as 2,700 old people die of cold every year.

Pensioner and Liberal Democrat MP, Mike Hancock has been trailing a new method of keeping pensioners warm through the cold winters by using an imported Russian to keep him warm.

For the last 4 years I’ve been using the method and it’s kept me nice and warm in the cold winter nights without costing me too much. I can recommend it to other pensioners. In fact, I’ve proposed to my Liberal Democrat colleagues that we should make it official policy.

In another policy announcement, the Liberal Democrat spokesperson for families, Baroness Walmsley, has proposed using imported Polish plumbers to help support mothers with young children:

I had a Polish plumber when I was a young mother and he was very effective with a plunger. All single mothers should have one at their beck and call.