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The Prime Minister today announced that a parliamentary inquiry into the growing banking scandal would be led by MPs, explaining that it was absolutely essential the investigation was led by professionals who also had extensive expertise and practical personal experience of lying, ripping off the public and stealing on a similar scale to bankers. 

Mr Cameron rejected demands by Labour leader Ed Miliband for a public inquiry to be led by judges, explaining that despite the deep respect he had for the proficiency and expertise of the legal profession when it came to doing very little at the public’s expense and being corrupt, they were amateurs compared to politicians and banking executives.

A separate request by Liberal Democrat MPs that the inquiry into illegal and immoral practices by bankers be led by a committee of second-hand car salesmen and door-to-door insurance representatives was also rejected by Mr Cameron:

While I fully understand that second-hand car salesman, as well as insurance representatives, are extremely proficient at lying and ripping people off, none of them are anywhere near as expert as we are.

However, pundits think the members of the inquiry, despite being MPs, may still find the specialist jargon, complicated financial instruments and the sheer scale of the greed, arrogance and corruption of top bankers difficult to comprehend.

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